Thursday, January 5, 2012

Dreaming of Giants....


So...I've been told time and time again that I should write down my dreams. That I dream so vividly I could turn them into stories or even that they can become part of story ideas I already have. Instead what ends up happening is that most of the time I forget or I'm lazy and I don't feel like being bothered, but if I'm going to give this whole writing thing a chance, then I should start somewhere....

The dream I had last night isn't very clear anymore...hell I don't think it was very clear when I woke up, but it was interesting and though I can't remember all of it I'm going to attempt to tell it.

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I was walking through the city one winters night, when I stumbled upon a Giant, wandering the streets. People where running from him, screaming in fear, but when I looked upon him I saw nothing but a confused and frightened individual. He looked like any man would look, except 20 feet tall and clothed only in what looked like shorts. He seemed unable to communicate, so without fear I approached him, took his hand, and with words and gestures convinced him to follow me to an ally where he wouldn't be seen. I hoped if he were away from the chaos he would calm down. When we reached the ally he broke away from me, trying to duck his large frame into a corner, crouching down, with he's head tucked, shaking and hugging his knees. So I did the only thing I could think of, I began talking to him, hoping somehow he would understand. As I continued to speak, very slowly his shaking ceased and he turned his head towards me. I knew from the look in his green blue eyes that he was beginning to understand, so I continued to talk, explaining why people were afraid of him, even cracking jokes that were more for my benefit then his. That was until he smiled. It was at that point I realized he understood more then I thought. So I began to ask him questions.

Who was he? What was he? Where was he from? How did he end up here? and after a long pause he spoke.

His voice was deep with an odd unfamiliar accent, and he spoke slowly as if using a language he barely knew. He told me his name was John. He spoke of his home land, miles and miles below ground where it was always hot. Of his people all as tall if not taller then him, and how they were having a civil war. How he had been sent to the battle, with an important task that could end the war when he had gotten lost in a strange fog filled with shining orange lights. He spoke of climbing through holes in rock, and walking down long dark tunnels until he heard the sound of voices. He followed those voices and it brought him here. He didn't know where he was, but he knew we were human. He was adamant he didn't want to hurt anyone and didn't understand why people were so afraid of him, all he wanted was to find a way home.

So without hesitation I decided to help him. I told him to stay with me, and that I would help him as best I could, but that first we needed to find him some clothing to keep him warm and as difficult as it may be, help him blend in. Standing he took my hand and we made our way back into the street.
He seemed a great deal smaller then when I first took him to the ally, but I believed it was my imagination. As we walked people would yelp and keep there distance but didn't seem as frightened as they were before, I thought at first it was because he was walking with me, but when I looked at him again, I realized it wasn't my imagination, he had in fact grown smaller, and that was why he inspired less fear.
As luck would have it we didn't have to walk far, for right across the street was a Big and Tall clothing store. I knew nothing in there would really fit him, but it was better then nothing and I rushed him across the street leaving in our wake the sound of screeching tires as we dashed past traffic.

The store was mostly empty except for one two customers and the sales staff which I was grateful for as I guided my new friend through the large glass front doors. The few who were near the doors couldn't keep there feet underneath themselves long enough for the speed in which they backed away from us, stumbling into racks of overlong shirts and ties. I scanned the crowd and found a sales person furthers from the others and approached. Having been isolated and busy folding shirts he hadn't noticed our arrival so when I spoke behind his back asking for help, he turned towards me with an easing going expression and casual smile. But  as his eyes adjusted to me and my companion the expression seemed to melt from his face as his eyes took us in. He froze in mid sentence staring at my companion and I saw the terror beginning to dawn on him, so before it could take over his senses I asked him loudly for the largest and longest clothing they had. That confused him, broke his concentration and triggered his years of salesmanship enough for him to turn to me. In a disbelieving and nasty voice he told me they carry anything in "That" size making a gesture to my companion. The gesture made me look back to see the John seemingly cowering behind me, trying in vain to conceal his height by crouching down, and worse I could see the hurt in his face to the reaction he was getting from the clerk. Seeing the pain in his eyes and his embarrassment made me feel so bad which in turn pissed me off that everyone was acting so heartless and blind. So I turned on the clerk and in a raised clipped tone I ordered him to get me one of everything in their largest size and that as soon as I got what I needed  we would leave. He rushed off with two of his fellow staff close on his heals and while they ran to fill my order I turned to John.
His shoulders slumped I noticed again that he had shrunk. So I finally asked him why this was, and he told me he wasn't sure. But that there was a connection between humans and his kind. That was when I put two and two together. Whenever he was hurt by humans emotionally, whenever his faith in us is tested and failed, he shrinks with the sadness it causes. The shrinking was emotional, and the more hurt he became by us, the more his faith in our species was lost, the more he shrank, and somehow I knew that this was a death sentence. More then ever I knew I had to help him and I had to start by getting him away from people.

As the clerks started loading up the counter with our order I started rambling through the clothing. I found a a pair of pants that would mostly fit with a drawstring waist, a shirt, a jacket, some socks and a pare of slippers that were too small but looked almost like shoes. Each of these items I took out of the pile and handed to John, telling him to put them on. I quickly paid for the items he wore, took his hand, and led him back outside, not once looking back to see the shocked faces of the sales staff. His shrinking has allowed some of the clothing to fit but I wasn't going to risk exposing him to any more fear or hatred. As we hit the cold night air my relief quickly turned to alarm as I realized the streets were deserted and there was a whistling in the wind. Then the next thing I knew John was violently lifting me into his arms and running as all hell broke loose.
It was chaos.
All I saw was the flash of light reflected off his jacket and the surrounding buildings, then a half second later I heard the explosion and I felt the blast through Johns body as he ran full speed down the street. That's when I heard the background of gunfire following us. I couldn't believe they were trying to kill him. He had done nothing and they were firing on him, and here he was saving me. I was one of them yet he was saving me.
I clung to his chest, trying desperately not to be a burden, keeping my eyes shut tight trying to hold up my own weight as best I could on my measly little arms, praying that he wasn't wounded when I felt him suddenly stop and change direction.
 His arms and legs began to move in unfamiliar ways and so I opened my eyes and ventured a peak over his shoulder. We were no longer in the street, in fact we were no longer on the ground. John was climbing a downtown skyscraper trying to get away from our pursuers. When I looked back at him I realized the chest I clung to was smaller still, he could almost fit the clothing I bought, be mistaken for a  human, but I feared he would continue to shrink before we reached the safety of the roof. If he did he wouldn't be able to hold us both up let alone himself, I couldn't let him risk himself for me. I couldn't be in a world that would kill such a kind being, I knew I was willing to die with him, or for him if necessary, but I couldn't let him die for me. I pleaded with him to leave me on a ledge somewhere, that he had to get away, but he just continued to climb. I knew he understood the words I said, the warnings, the pleading. I knew he saw the risk, but he would not leave me behind. I did what I could to help, and when he could no longer hold me to his chest, I adjusted my position and moved onto his back so he could use both arms freely.

Time dragged on, and the sound of gunshots grew fainter the higher we climbed. Then finally when I could feel his strength waning beneath me I saw our goal. The rooftop was close at hand. I knew deep down we weren't truly safe. That then men with the guns were probably already on there way up. But it was a for of safety, a place to finally rest and for now that was good enough for me. As we neared the top he asked me to change my position back to his chest and bringing his arm around helped me. We were only a few feet away from the roof when I heard his horse voice tell me to climb. So I did. I climbed with his support. I felt his reassuring arm on my back as the winds whipped my hair about my face. Then before I knew it I felt the ledge beneath my fingers and with one final push from John I was on the roof. My heart pounding in my ears I rolled onto my belly and leaned over the edge, the gravel of the roof biting into my skin. I saw John fully for the first time since we started the climb and I couldn't believe my eyes. The clothing I had bought hung from his arms and legs like a child wearing his fathers clothing. The wind tearing at the material trying to pull him away from the cold stone. He looked so weary, so tired and I feared I was going to loose him. I called to him, desperate to see his face, to get him to push just a little bit further. I reached out my hand yelling into the wind for him to take it, telling him to not give up. I watched him turn his head toward me, his exhausted green blue eyes looking into mine and I realized with a shock I was in love with him. He couldn't die, I wouldn't let him. I was crazy, true, I was in love with a strange Giant I had met just a few hours ago. But it was what it was and I wasn't going to allowing this strange being to die if I could help it.
I yelled out again for him to take my hand and though his eyes told me he was ready to give up, ready to fall, I saw his hand reach up toward mine. I stretched as far as I could, bracing my other arm on the lip of the ledge, and I reached. I couldn't see him from my position and I feared he had fallen, that I was reaching into nothingness, until I felt his warm ruff hand grabbing mine and all I could think at that point was pull. I pulled till I thought I would tear out my arm from my shoulder, but slowly I felt him come up. Pulling back I grab his arm with my other arm, bracing my feet against the ledge, pushing back and pulling upwards with all my might. First I saw his other hand scrambling for the ledge, then I saw his head poke up and with one final pull I was able to get the rest of him onto the safety of the rooftop.

Rolling onto my back I let the relief of seeing him safe wash over me, our gasping breathing the only sound heard over the wine of the wind. And just as I was beginning to feel safe, I heard the distant air chop of helicopter blades and I knew they were coming for us. With little to no strength left in my limbs I willed myself to rolled over and crawl to him. His eyes were closed but he was breathing. He was the size on an ordinary man and I knew if I didn't do something, they would take him away. Grabbing his now over-sized shirt I pulled us both stumbling onto our feet. He opened his eyes and I saw defeat in them. As the sound of the helicopters grew closer I had to yell over the noise. I shook him and told him he had to run, he had to get away, I told him he can't let them get him. But he just stared back at me, all fight gone from him face. He didn't even have the strength to speak. They were coming, the wind was kicking us around sounding there approach, I saw the beam of there lights working there way up the sides the building.
I was out of time...so I looked one last time into his beautiful green blue eyes, and I kissed him.

It was as if time stopped. There was only him and I. The roof, the wind, the biting cold, and sound of the choppers were all gone. I opened my eyes to see surprise and joy in his as he held me close and kissed me, passion flowing from his moving lips to mine. My skin turned to flame at his touch while my muscles melted beneath his arms, it was a moment suspended in time and that was when I felt the change. I felt his hands grow larger against my back and his chest expanded. I pulled away just in time to see his smiling face shoot 20 feet upwards as his body returned to his natural form. All over him was a strange orange fog lit from within as if filled with dancing fireflies. He staggered backward with the force of the change slipping on the gravel rooftop. I screamed his name as I watched him fall over the edge, his arms flaying in helpless circles. I ran reaching out for him but I was too far away and he was too big. I watched helplessly as he fell in slow motion, the helicopter right beneath him, but when I saw his face there was no fear, I saw only a smile of his face and his green blue eyes shining as the orange fog enveloped him and he disappeared.
Time then took up it's normal rhythm as I collapsed on my knees at the edge of the rooftop. Feeling empty ,the cold wind whipped at my hair as the sound of the choppers surrounded me. I looked down at my fist resting in my lap, feeling the piece of paper he slipped in my hand before he began to change. Carefully I opened my fist, making sure the wind didn't snatch it away, and saw a small folded piece of paper. Opening it up I saw written in it these words:
"If you should ever need me, all you need do is call my name and I will come"

Looking up at the cloudless night sky I smiled...I knew he was home....

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Just a Little Something I Wrote (revised part 1)

Darkness...why must everything return to darkness...

My mind had wondered again...dangerous...stupid...
I tried to re-focus. I closed my eyes and listened.
Just the normal silence, my heart beat, the steady breathing by the door, the scrape of tiny nails within the wall, the piercing scream of a woman….
I open my eyes...and the sound fades to its natural volume...miles away...
It should frighten me, make my heart skip, the way it used to, but...I feel... nothing...empty...hollow...

I can tell it's not her so why should I care. It’s just another woman...stupid enough to get caught.
But I should be glad...that scream was heard for miles. They'll follow it back to its source like fly's to shit. They always do...the fucking scum...and the others...they'll stay hidden...scared back into there cages like frightened birds.
Our hunting zone should be clear...at least for a few days...
So...I guess I should be grateful to that pathetic woman...but no...I don't even feel that...

Shit...I'm getting distracted again, got to refocus... (deep breath)...
Forcing my tired eyes wide... I bring myself back to the present...

To anyone else this room would be pitch black. For me, that little bit of light coming in through the shattered windows changes everything.
It lets me see every single corner of this black puddle of shit I used to call a home, as if every object in it were lit from within.
Now it's just another empty apartment. All the warmth it once had destroyed, like the broken glass that's scattered across the floor, reflecting the blackness back on itself. All that's left are pieces of furniture, crumpled newspapers, empty cans, torn sheets, and me... sitting very still on a torn cushion in the middle of the room.

My eye gets drawn back to the glint of the knife in my hand and my thoughts return to there original occupation...

How easy it would be...to let it slip...to let it find its way into the deep flesh of my wrist…
It wouldn't hurt.....well...maybe only at first...then the delicious numbing would spread as the warm liquid gushed down my hand and on to the floor.
God! How I remember that feeling! 
I could just lay back, fall asleep and this would all be over...a nightmare finally ended.

My eyes closed again as I wallowed in this gruesome fantasy, mindlessly lifting the knife and pressing its side against the soft flesh of my inner wrist, feeling the kiss of the cold steel sending shivers through my body. It would be so easy to just turn the knife...no one would care...but as if in answer to my thoughts the sound of a growl...

My eyes snapped open...
FUCK!
My stupid fucking mind wandered again and now it could mean our lives. I wouldn't be the only one to pay for my failure and the thought tore at my center.

I secured my grip around the worn handle of the knife, ready to spill the blood of another, my own blood now forgotten.
Rocking to the balls of my feet, I moved swiftly to my position crouched behind the wall, the adrenalin making me steady, clearing my mind.
I may have been taken off guard this time, but nothing else would get past me, that was a fact.

I was pissed now and that made me even more dangerous then usual. Pissed that I had lost focus, pissed that my mind was weak, but I could feel the strength in my limbs increase with every breath, my senses clear and on full alert.
Whoever made the mistake of coming through that door would be meeting their death by my hand, and somehow that thought made me smile.

I gave the room one last scan before turning my full attention to the hallway and the source of the warning.

It was even darker then the room I was in, but I could see the one who had awoken me as clear as day. Standing at full alert in front of our barricaded door, his large head lowered as slow growls continued to escape his upturned lips, the red fur between his massive shoulders standing on end. I watched my brother with admiration, as the sound of what captured his attention reached my ears.

Someone had entered our building...